PLease help? How do I tell my bro?

Well I'm 27 and my little brother is 18! and we were litttle I always sorta blamed him for things going wrong in my life! My mom was a single mom and I as a teenager and i always had to babysit him! and I didn't want to! I wanted to be out doing things with my friends (drinking,smoking etc.) I always told him he was the reason why my friends hated me and He's the reason why my life was so hard!..I know It sounds harsh! But I had to babysit ALOT and take him places with me! I'm not saying I never got any free time! But He was with me alot...My friends started pushing away from me....I blammed him. but were adults now!..But I feel bad cause he still to this day thinks He's what went wrong in my life and..honestly he wasn't what went wrong with anything,,he's what saved me from doing drugs and killing myslef like my friends were, if he hadn't came along, I could possibly be a crackhead righht now, but how do I tell him, That he is what saved me?